&& HURT;

Thursday, July 26, 2007

if you look hard enough, you'll spot my face in the crowd

ok. so i believe that all sec 4s have expectations from their cca, from their juniors. Especially when one is very very attached to the cca and has experienced the many ups and downs in their 4 yrs in it. and i think having expectations is perfectly fine. Even i hope for the best for my cca. I've always have dreams that Innovaton and Enterprise Club will make it big one day. Although we're not quite there yet, but i must say we have improved alot since my first day in the cca. i still remember the very first meeting in Seconday one. When we didn't even have a proper meeting place and had to walk around the entire school and finally end up in the lousy computer lab 45mins after the official starting time. (Btw, it was just enterprise club at that time. without the Innovation in front.) Everything was so chaotic and messy and noisy at that time. Students were screaming and shouting across the room, no one bothered to maintain discipline and order. The teacher was all alone in a desperate attempt to get everything and everyone in order. seriously, that was my first impression in the cca. I thought i had made the wrong choice in choosing this cca. All the discouragements and degrading remarks from seniors came flooding into my brain and i thought i better seek out a second cca just in case i don't get my cca points from I&E. But somehow, i managed to settle in this cca. And started to know really nice people like yasmin and the seniors. we worked together in various projects. However, it was only till sec 2 did i really feel proud of my cca. Before that, whenever someone asked me about my cca, i'll feel rather embarrassed and try to avoid the topic unless absolutely neccesary. And i joined competitions for my own sake and not in the interest of doing the CCA proud. But somehow, i started to feel more attached in Sec 2 and begin to feel the joy in going for meetings instead of dreading it. Although there were times when i would moan and groan about trainings, but it was only through such trainings did i learn more about entrepreneurship. no doubt the sessions were sometimes boring and dry, but i definitely learn from these sessions. so to cut a long story short. I definitely love my cca now and we have definitely improved in many areas. Like launching Fun With Animals in 2005, 50th Anniversary + Pullover+Mama store in 2006 and making it into finals for YES-NEC this yr. On top of these, meetings are now more organised and it's the CEO heading the meeting instead of the teachers. All these did not happen when i first joined the cca. And i'm proud of the fact that i'm in the first batch of first-cca-member to graduate from the club. i really hope Enterprise will continue to strive for excellence and keep on improving. No doubt i really wish you guys will win a competition and prove to those arrogants out there that I&E is not a slackers' cca, but ultimately, it's really the journey as an I&E clubber that we should all cherish. As a graduated sec 4 member, all i can do now is to reminise the past and come back occasionally for meetings. But the feeling will never be the same as last time anymore.

And to the other sec 4s who are really worried and stressed over the way their juniors is heading the cca, all i can say is that we got to learn to let go of certain things. Now is the time for their term of office, seriously speaking, why don't we just take a step to the side and let them lead the CCA. it's only fair to them since it's their one yr of leading the cca. this one yr is gonna be extremely short and it would not be possible for them to seek out new horizons if we as seniors keep breathing down their necks. i'm not pinpointing any cca or anyone here. I'm just saying that we started off in sec 3, unsure and afraid. We made mistakes along the way but it was only through mistakes did we learn. So why not let them face the consequences of their actions and let them reflect and learn. I always believe it's pointless to guide them on the safe path and not allow them to fall. It's crucial that they have a taste of what their actions will result in. Of course every senior wants to see the CCA prosper and will never allow any room for mistakes and backsliding. Even i think like that. But the point here is, there is no use fretting down here because we've already stepped down. The juniors are not obliged to listen to our every command anymore. In fact, we should be glad that they even listen to us. It's purely out of respect and nothing more than that. We're all perfectionist and we want to live up to expectations. All i can say is that just guide from the side and support your juniors. They'll need it. In fact they need your support more than your scoldings. You've been through what your juniors are facing. it was a tough time, i believe. So why make things even harder for them? And once again, let me make it clear i'm not pinpointing anyone here. This is just a general observation i've made and hope someone will agree with my point of view. I know talking is all easy, but action is another thing. I'm still learning myself. Sometimes i do get so critical about my cca and the way things are run. but whenever i put myself in the shoes of my juniors, i'll try to bite my tongue back and not comment. Having faith and confidence in your juniors is something every senior must try to learn.

Alright, i haven't been writing this kind of post for a really long time. i hope noone gets offended. And rmb to VOTE FOR CRESCENT!!!! (link in prev post)

because even in a black and white memory, we'll still be able to find a reason to smile

signed and sealed with love at...10:19 PM
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