there i was waiting for you at our usual spot

well...life's been pretty much the norm. i just want to jump out of this whole self-pity thing and look at others around me. afterall i'm not the only one suffering and instead of just sitting here complaining, it's time i get up and do something. plain talk and no action is just a waste of time.

school has been fine other than the screw up of e math test. been screwing up the 2 tests so far i need to buck up. i studied too hard for chi thinking that phrases out of the textbook would come out but everything was exactly the same. damn. that explains the lack of prep for e math.

mrs lee came in to our class during cme today...the talk was alright i guess. made me start to think about where i want to go in life. but the thing is i really don't know. but i guess i'm not worrying that much cause God will eventually direct me somewhere he wants me to be. i don't want to come to a decision now and misintepret it as God's wishes cause sometimes people have the tendency to be so concerned with what THEY want instead of what GOD wants. let's just say my options are still pretty open now and i'm still looking around. was thinking of event organiser or just starting up my own company. but starting up myself would require idea...and i've got absolutely no ideas at all. and it includes alot of risks. i'm just not too sure if i'm ready to take up all the risks. as for event organiser i would say it's rather fine. but then again, i'm not sure if i can take the stress of keeping to datelines and ensuring that the whole event turns out good. my point is, whatever i want to do next time doesn't seem to have anything to do with what i'm learning now. sometimes i'm just losing my focus and don't see the point or need to work so hard in my studies now when i'm sure i won't use them next time. it seems kind of useless to put in so much time for something i'll probably not use at all next time. hiaz...someone pls enlighten me..??

oooh...there's half day on friday so that's a good thing. but then there's common test to mug for. i'm only ready for SS and nothing else. i hope i don't waste my time pigging on all the cny goodies but use it to study instead. i've got to brush up on e math especially. and i'll try my best to be patient in emath class and try to decipher whatever mrs gek is saying. realised that i cant go on complaining about her and not doing anything myself to adjust to her teaching methods. there's no point complaining but just try to keep up with her i guess...

signed and sealed with love at...11:37 PM
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