the world don't stop

ok...rather random heading. but was just thinking that in a blink of an eye, one more year has flown past. which means 2006 is coming to an end once the clock strikes 12 tonight. and a new year will begin. well...i've been reflecting alot about 2006.

ok...so 2006 hasn't been that exactly smooth sailing. but i would say it's a good year (overall) with many valuable lessons learnt. like in march/april when i stepped up as the CEO for enterprise, preparing for the launch of mama store where pearlyn, amanda and i slogged our hearts out and almost got locked up (for many times). then finally the launch of mama store and trying to get it running, to the closure of it. although mama store will cease to function anymore, i will always remember the sweat and tears shed during the whole running of it. to planning and execution. and not to forget the politics happening due to the vying for positions etc. (yes, i'm being very open and honest here) and then when all the responsibilities as a CEO floods in, and when i step up as a member of student council exco 2006/2007. at that time i was still rather lost, trying to juggle so many things at one time. even wondering if accepting the post as discipline head in the exco was something i should have rejected. but now, i know all these are worthwhile. putting in my heart and soul into things out of academics is something that will make my years as a Crescentian meaningful and memorable. now, i am sure i love every single thing i've done, be it for cca or for council. tho i do have complains here and there, but they are purely just for letting out some steam. at the end of the day, these things really mean soso much to me. i will really put my all into cca and council for the last three months in it.

as for academics. i must say i'm rather dissapointed with myself. although it's not TAT bad, but i know i could have done better. i could have juggled my cca, council and studies way better than i did. the stress is really immense when you are in a c class, and in a hcl class whereby every class is attended with a tense heart. knowing that no matter how hard you listen, how hard you work, the test/exam script you get back is either just a pass or even a fail. i just cant describe that feeling. it's just v v hard to bear. and knowing that you might be kicked out of hcl anytime is also a stress i have to face each day. i used to love the language. but sometimes all the pressure is just too much to bear i want to give up. but i'm glad God helped me hang in there. we will all see when the o level results come out.

personally, i felt that my temper was just so bad this year. i seem to flare up alot. like it's the most in history so far. always complaining about this and that. 'scolding' friends around me. i'm really sorry for making live so difficult! this goes out to pearlyn, chuting, zifang, edwyna and all those i've offended in one way or another. i'm really sorry. i'll change next yr. i promise.

what i regretted the most this year is not academics. (actl i thought that was the thing i regretted the most, but attending family camp has changed this) rather, i regretted not having a stronger relationship with God. if i had turn towards God when facing all the challenges this year, i'm sure i would have emerged a stronger and better person. i would not have flared up so easily. i would not have complained so much but to just accept them. my thoughts are in a whirl now as everything floods back. if you ask me what's my resolution(s) for yr 2007, i would say it is to spend each day closer to God and rely on him to give me strength instead of myself. of course i have alot more other resolutions. but this is really the most important one to me. nothing is worth more than having a good relationship with God.

yups...this is just a short summary of my life in 2006. the exact details will be written down in my diary and locked up somewhere. i'm sorry but there are just some parts of my life that are too private to share here.

anyhows, i pretty much like the sermon today. we didn't have sunday school cuz it's sunday school day today! (if u use direct translation) hahas. actually i don't know why this day is set, but it's fine with me. the nursery kids performance was just too cute. i like the puppet show too! mummy was laughing at me during sermon cuz i was kinda dozing off. but then after closing my eyes for like 15-20 seconds, i will suddenly wake up and start scribbling stuff into my notebook. mummy was asking am i really sleeping. but to say the truth i was! but i don't know why somehow i can still hear pastor huang when i'm sleeping and like something in me keeps struggling to wake up. amazing isn't it. but i'll sleep earlier on saturday nights and try not to doze off during service.

ok...i'm off to do serious homework!

signed and sealed with love at...3:16 PM
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